You’ve been seeing this girl for a little while now and she’s just really amazing. And you’re feeling things you’ve never felt before. But what is this feeling? Is it love or lust?

Sometimes it can be very difficult to understand exactly how you’re feeling once you’re in that moment, because of all the things that’s happening inside your brain — all those chemicals be mixin’ things up. But one thing to start with that will help you really identify what you’re feeling is that lust is purely derived from the physical impulses you may be having currently towards her. Carnal, very.

Eventually though, lust fades.

But anyhow, these are some things that will help you figure out what you’re actually feeling.

Lust


Face, butt, boobs, figure, hair. You name it. If it’s just looks and the body, then it’s just lust.
Sex over conversations. Actually, just sex with no conversations is fine.
When shit gets real…well, you prefer to just keep things not real.
Cuddles and breakfast the next day? Screw that! Just sex please.
Lovers only, but there really is no friendship.
Very conditional, which is the opposite of love being unconditional.
Neediness.

Love

Quality time together to create memories and experiences together.
“Lost in conversation” applies here.
The other person’s happiness and feelings are top priority.
They motivate you to become a better person.
You want to meet the most important people in their lives — their family and close friends.
They’re the only one for you.

Usually, lust is just one of the first stages of romantic love, which could lead to something so much more serious down the line. It really is all about putting the time into the relationship and sharing worthwhile experiences together.

However, there are also things that could signal that it just isn’t right anymore:

Your gut says “danger!” or “beware!” And yes, both with exclamation marks.
You feel drained after being together.
It feels dark and destructive.
You aren’t comfortable with how they’re treating you, but you fear that saying anything will push them away.

Just find the balance. Lust can sometimes lead to love, but not always.

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